Lonely Again
I am trying to see things in perspective. My dog wants a bite of my peanut butter chocolate chip bagel. I know she cannot have this, because chocolate makes dogs very sick. My dog does not understand this. She pouts and wraps herself around my leg like a scarf and purrs and tries to convince me to give her just a tiny bit. When I do not give in, she eventually gives up and lays in the corner, under the piano, drooping and sad. I hope the universe has my best interest in mind like I have my dog’s. When I want something with my whole being, and the universe withholds it from me, I hope the universe thinks to herself: "Silly girl. She thinks this is what she wants, but she does not understand how it will hurt.
—THEORIES ABOUT THE UNIVERSE by Blythe Baird (via shroomfairy)

(Source: blythebrooklyn)

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tags: + thoughts + words
I was always holding onto people, and they were always leaving.
—Lili St. Crow, Jealousy (via observando)
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tags: + me

(Source: lokilokibangbang)

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extrasad:

Fuck. It’s ironic how empty I am because 

I swear 6 months ago I had the universe inside

of me but I cried the rivers in my bones dry.

The volcanoes in my chest erupted when you told

me you didn’t love me anymore and lava flooded

my body and hardened till I stopped sleeping.

I had stars in my lungs but I burned them

all out with the cigarettes I was smoking

to get you the fuck out of my throat. The

flowers growing at the bottoms of my

stomach are dead. Apparently you  

can’t water flowers with vodka.

I had the sky in my veins but it’s

been pretty fucking stormy since I

ripped them open. I had planets 

on the tip of my tongue but

the debris from the shattered 

remains of “us” have been

crashing into them. I was

everything. And then I met

you and we were everything.

Now you’re fucking some

blonde girl who gets

high all the time and

I’m a fucking

mess.

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Brand New

(Source: behindmcr)

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(Source: uncacti)

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I pushed away all of the good things that came to me and held on for dear life to all of the things that were no good for me. My whole world is a mess, it always has been. 

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tags: + bpd + borderline personality disorder + mental illness + personal + me

1. Stop looking for love between the sheets with people you won’t ever call back, and stop giving them reason to think that you might.

2. It’s okay if your feelings towards someone change, yes it’s awful but it’s also natural, and mostly unavoidable. That’s out of your control, how you deal with it isn’t. Be kind.

3. Just because your father left when you were little doesn’t mean everyone will, take care of others.

4. Just because your father left when you were little doesn’t mean someone else won’t, take care of yourself.

5. Just because you can walk away from something doesn’t mean you should. No one is replaceable, whether they played a big part in your life or not.

6. Not all goodbyes are for the best.

7. Some goodbyes are.

8. It’s okay to tell someone ‘don’t fucking speak to me again’ and still will it to be their voice on the other end of the phone when it rings.

9. Forgive yourself. For all the shitty things you do, apologise to the people you hurt and forgive yourself, even if they don’t.

10. You are you, and you can’t change that (for the most part anyway). Love every inch of yourself and when someone else doesn’t, kiss yourself better and move the fuck on. Your self worth isn’t defined by how someone else sees you.

—'All the things I wish I'd have known when I was 16 but didn't learn until I was 22.' - HE. (via stayygone)
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And he loves her. He loves her like he can never grab enough of her between his fingers. And no matter how close he gets, even when they make love, it never feels close enough.
—Iain S. Thomas, Intentional Dissonance (via avvfvl)

(Source: virgin-unicorn)

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Heaven exists.
It’s 7pm with your lips pressed against mine.
Hell exists.
It’s 3am with you on my mind and not in my bed.
—Heaven and hell (via gretzky)

(Source: unpoeticheartbreak)

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